Tuesday, February 8, 2011


Am I the only one who thinks morning showers are a colossal waste of time? I especially loathe how I have to wash my hair, and then it's a wet tangled mess that I have to DO something with. And then my skin is wet and it's hard to get dressed, and since I have to go to work there is a time limit associated with it. I have to find a clean towel, or at least one that is not covered in cat hair or little boy pee. Geez, it's all such a giant pain in my ass.

And for what? So I can do it all over again the next day? Man, it's worse than dishes! At least if I don't wash the dishes people will still be willing to sit next to me in the interminable staff meeting. I mean, if there's no other seats.

I've always been a bit of a hippie, you know; mineral deodorant and tea tree oil instead of lady speed stick, ixnay on the ipsticklay, and I drink organic wine whenever I can. Heck, I even like patchouli and shoes that look like baked potatoes!

So I think it's time for a change. I'm going to be revolting soon, like the Egyptian freedom fighters. Come on, you know those people are good and dirty now, after weeks of marching in the streets, and I, for one, am very pleased with their heroic efforts. REVOLTING IS GOOD, PEOPLE! JOIN ME, IF YOU DARE!

Next on the chopping block: dental hygiene.

1 comment:

Helen said...

I will never, ever support you in this movement.